How to Recognize the "Sacred"

Read this first: D. Sylvan on Sacred Sex.

No, really. Go read it FIRST.

Ok.
Just like Longinus' discussion of the sublime, it's often easier to define an esoteric concept by explaining what it isn't.

Something sacred brings us closer to the Divine. It doesn't drive the best part of ourselves underground or make us sick for a week. The "sacred" doesn't leave us feeling "scarred" or "scared." It will never scatter our energy to the wind. It will never betray.

The sacred doesn't hide behind false friendship, false logic or false pride. It does not become titillated by people's worst moments. It doesn't fail to recognize worst moments or fail to act against popular opinion if required.

Only the sacred has integrity. The sacred waits for its moment to reveal itself. It needs no manipulation.

The sacred will always be recognized and/or adored without hesitation by children, true lovers, animals, and people about to die. Through these people and things, all things are eventually embraced by the sacred. Therefore, when we hurt one strand in the web of life we damage the others, too. Honoring the connections we make with others and treating all with dignity is sacred.

The sacred is all around us, constantly stroking our faces, urging us to look, listen and feel. Since the sap of kundalini is always on the rise somewhere, we can perpetually be filled with higher consciousness if we wish to tap it. Standing in the sunlight, listening to the rain, admiring a loved one are all ways to share kundalini. And kundalini is sacred energy we can feel anywhere in our being, on any level.

The sacred doesn't believe that it needs to open its legs to every sexy person who drunkenly stumbles into its path. It's true that the sacred is manifest in sexy people, and that can be quite intoxicating. But if we see the Divine in his/her erotic aspect in a person, should we not respect that person as if they actually were the Divine (since s/he kinda is in that moment)? And respect the connections in their web? So, despite what we've heard about "temple prostitutes" of ancient and distant pagan cultures, the sacred never treats sexy people like whores -- even if they are doing a good job of acting like one. Indeed, to take advantage of people at their nadir is usually called rape. Definitely not sacred. Or sexy, for that matter.

Finally, know that the sacred resides in the self. If we cannot embody our present moment, if we are vain, prideful, manipulative, hypocritical and attached to our own view, then we are likely to miss the joy of our own truth. The blog post at the top of this one discusses the importance of healing and knowing oneself through an occasional period of celibacy. Right now, our culture finds the very thought of any restraints on sexuality to be a waste of time -- time that could be spent out there getting laid! This is utter crap, and anyone who has chosen celibacy for a period of time for the purpose of healing the self will tell you so as well. The post also addresses polyamoury. Allegedly, on some planet I have yet to visit, this works for some people. I have no proof of it, and it does not appeal to me. It is reasonable to think that reasonable people should be able to choose their style of relationship without the judgment of others. And aren't we all a bit poly in our coltish, young years when we're learning about what we like and need? People who use polyamoury as an excuse to fill up their own lack of character or relieve their boredom are not engaging in sacred sex -- they are avoiding their own despair. The sacred does not need to be validated by another, and yet another, and still another person's sex organs. Sacred sexuality, when we really engage it, pierces all illusions and connects us to our beloved on the absolute deepest levels of our being. People who scatter themselves across a sea of bodies will never know this. What I am talking about is transcending the self, the other, and reaching the Divine through the deepest love possible. The most profound honor one can bestow upon another is to see them as Radha, the lover of Krishna. Radha is the embodiment of total love, positively dripping with it. But, only through loving Radha can Krishna understand what it means to love himself, even though he is the God of Love. And he becomes enraptured with loving Radha because her love for him is the only thing hotter than he is in the universe.

This is how I recognize the sacred.